I almost said I’ve never heard this phrase so much in my life… but that would be a bold faced lie..I think my dad was scared to give me an answer on anything, but you know how it goes... I definitely took advantage of his nonchalant, too cool for t.v, just go with it attitude. lol
This year has been such a rollercoaster ride. I’ve learned so much and grown in a short period of time.
With A highSchool senior, a high school sophomore, a homeschooled 8th grader and Covid,
The good, The bad, and The Ugly have all shown up at my house in the last 2 years.
We graduated our first born!
Yayyy, or at least that’s how it was supposed to feel.
It was more of a struggle trying to get him through the year being in and out the classroom, a disastrous end to a perfect football season, dealing with teenage peer pressure, our company throwing a city prom because the schools weren’t having one, deciding where to attend college, finding the time to take a vacation and connect, my emotions all over the place because they’re growing up, and the pressure of making sure you’ve said everything you think needs to be said before they go off to college and start making their own decisions.
Above all, dealing with the stress of Covid-19 and the reality of knowing that nothing was going to go the way we would have planned for his senior year.
This is only a drop in the bucket to how 2021 has gone. The one thing I have had to embrace, and also share with my sons is that I don’t have all the answers. I’ve said to them, “The same way you need grace I expect you to give me grace too. This is my first time raising teenagers. We’re learning and growing together.”
So my question is...Why do the moms get all the hard parenting questions?
Are We overprotective? Do we put more thought into things? Are we expected to have better discernment about the “what ifs?” I couldn’t figure it out, but in the last few years, raising teenage boys,(we don’t have any girls so I can’t really speak on the difference.) I’ve really had to share this load with my husband.
Here's what I've learned, at times the authoritative character of a man throws teenagers back into a shell a bit, maybe based on the subject.
I realize that although sometimes the conversation needs to be had with “a Man” it also requires a sense of compassion.
Regardless of how much they show it or not, our sons really look up to their fathers.
My oldest is more like his dad than he cares to admit, but I love the fact that he wants to make his father proud.
The transition of “mom talks to dad talks” was quite interesting. There were times that I had to help my husband understand what his children were saying and times I had to help the children understand what their father was saying.
There are a lot of strained relationships between father and son during the teenage years, I think it’s because of the male ego. Authority, Respect, and Honor are the things that most men look for from their children and also their wives. As mothers we look for Respect, but there’s also a great emphasis on relationship- the LOVE factor. This is where the nurturing and compassion kick in, and I have had to understand when to chime in and when to let what is said “BE.” I never want to interfere with the process of my guys understanding what it takes to be a successful Man, and although there are lots of mothers that have raised amazing men, I am blessed to have a husband and father to my children to fill that role.
It’s definitely been a journey as we now have a college student, grooming our high school junior for senior year, and a high school freshman… sheesh. I don’t know how mothers with more than 3 children that are close in age keep up. Especially working moms!
I’ll keep providing tips as I learn! And If you have some tips for me, feel free to respond to the blog.
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